Will somebody please tell me how to determine which way to turn when you get off that darn elevator at Binion’s Horseshoe? I have been staying at Binions for 14 years and as of last May, at the World Series of Sbobet Indonesia Poker, I have never been able to figure out which way to turn when I get to the casino floor. I always take a couple of steps out, look one way — usually it’s the wrong way — then look the other, get my bearings and head toward the poker area. Okay, I’m not that dumb. I figured out a long time ago that if I paid attention to which side I was getting on at the top, I would know which way to turn at the bottom. But I never think about it until I hit the casino floor.

I don’t think it’s just me either, because my wife is a very bright woman and she usually is waiting for my lead when we get to the casino floor. Furthermore, I notice everyone else is doing the same thing as I’m doing. Don’t believe me? I dare you to someday stand by the elevator on the casino floor at Binions. I will guarantee you that most people coming down from upstairs will be craning their neck, trying to figure out where they are and which way to go.

Speaking of elevators, will somebody please tell me how to tell the difference between an Englishman and an Australian. Let me explain. It seems many times during a tournament in Las Vegas, I find myself in the elevator with someone else. Usually I will say something like, “How’s it going?” Too many times to count, I have been answered by a person with an English accent. This is …